Getting it All Done Without Losing Your Mind
As a multitasker extraordinaire and mother of six children, Kelly Pardue knows what it’s like to have a busy day. In this article, she shares her top tips for navigating life’s demands and the importance of turning to the Lord for help.
5:00 a.m. – Wake up, pray, rotate laundry and unload the dishwasher
5:15 a.m. – Wake up kids for seminary and fold that laundry from the dryer
5:20 a.m. – No really, wake up (repeat at 5:25 and again at 5:30 and stay until you see movement)
5:40 a.m. – Kids A & B to seminary (thankfully I just have to get them out the door, not drive them)
5:45 a.m. – Wake up Kid C then throw something in the crockpot (try to remember to turn it ON)
6:00 a.m. – Check on Kid C, remember the dishwasher and clean clothes and finish those jobs
6:20 a.m. – Wake up Kids D, E and F, take Kid C to sports practice (pray with him in the car)
6:50 a.m. – Pick up kids A & B and take them to school (pray with them in the car)
7:15 a.m. – Feed kids, remind them to take care of hair, teeth & shoes, pack my stuff for the day
7:40 a.m. – Take kids D, E and F to school (pray with them in the car)
8:15 a.m. – TIME FOR THE DAY TO START!
This is what a pretty typical morning looks like for me. The exact details of your life look a little different than mine, but we’re all busy. We have families, callings, homes, work, community responsibilities…and only 24 hours in a day. Does anyone know why God designed us to need to sleep for a third of our lives?? It’s probably so we’ll stop trying to do so much that isn’t really important.
I’d like to share a few tips I’ve gathered over the last couple of decades for getting as much crossed off that list as possible—without losing your mind. What works for me, may not work for you. What worked for me a year ago or ten years ago doesn’t work for me now. My exact plan likely won’t work for me as soon as next semester. Take these ideas if they speak to you and just leave them right here if they don’t. Whatever you do, don’t let what follows add to your stress! Without further ado….
Make a schedule, but don’t get married to it…it’s always flexible.
If I were to write down the EXACT times that I wrote above, it would never work out precisely and I would be stressed—trust me, I’ve tried. So, I just have an outline of what needs to be done, in what order and I plan my wake-up time by how much time I’ll need. Sleep gets scheduled based on wake- up time. So yes, I ignored your call or text at 8:30 p.m. because I was already winding down for the night.
1. Put the Lord on that schedule.
There’s a lot of prayer in my life first thing in the morning. I’m well aware that I can’t do life without God’s help. But I don’t feel the need to put scripture study at the top of my day because I’d be so tired it wouldn’t do any good. I *currently* have that scheduled for 10:30 a.m. because that’s a good time for me. Choose a good time for the good things.
2. Put your well-being on that schedule.
What do you need to be at your best? Exercise? Journaling? Half an hour to read something interesting (alone)? Whatever refills your mental and emotional bucket—you’ve already planned for your spiritual bucket—gets a non-negotiable spot on your schedule. I literally need exercise to stave off anxiety and depression. Am I spending 3 hours a day training for a marathon? Uh, no. I’m doing something I enjoy for long enough to get sweaty and raise my heart rate (and have fun)! Be reasonable, but take care of yourself so you have the capacity to take care of everything else.
3. Practice gratitude.
Do you ever find your mind wandering? Maybe while you’re doing a task that requires your hands but not much brain power? Those are the spaces that negative thoughts tend to creep in. “I hate this chore.” “I’ll never get all of this done today.” I feel icky just typing those sentences. Instead, notice everything that’s amazing and have an on-going prayer of gratitude throughout the day. See the sunrise? Be grateful. Someone opened the door for you? Be grateful! You just spent so much money on your bills? It’s so awesome that you have a home to live in and A/C and how incredible that we have lights at night in every single room and, seriously friends, running water from a tap right inside our house.
4. Use the empty spaces.
Many times throughout the day we have little bitty mini breaks. What can you do in 2 minutes or less? I can fold 4 items from the laundry while I swish my mouthwash. I can gather trash from my car after I park in the driveway (especially if I have a few grocery bags stashed away for just this purpose). I can text the sisters I minister to while I wait for a class or meeting to start. I’m writing this article after a class that (surprise!) got out a little early. I can vacuum just the rug while my broccoli is being microwaved for dinner (and I’m not afraid to use the microwave because time is more important than gourmet for me right now). Let me say this out loud: YOU DON’T HAVE TO FINISH AN ENTIRE CHORE ALL AT ONCE!
The Pardue Family. From the top, left to right:
Kelly and her husband Jeremy and their kids, Logan, Jacey, Daisy, Ethan, Adley and Myles. Photo courtesy of Kelly Pardue.
5. Pat yourself on the back and stop with the guilt.
At the end of the day, there will always be things that could have gotten accomplished “if only.” Toss out everything that’s left to do. You did enough. Everything else will work out…later. You are just one person with two hands and I promise you did everything that was the very most important, especially if you made time for the Lord. Spend a few minutes at the end of your day noticing how He helped you and thank Him. Tell yourself how proud you are of how you handled today. Thank yourself for doing that one thing nobody will even notice—like cleaning the toilet. You are amazing!
Friends, “with God, all things are possible.” That does not mean that everything needs to happen in one day. He does not expect that of us. (Remember how He designed us to need so much sleep?) Ask yourselves: What season of life am I in right now? What are the top priorities for this season? These are the things that are possible. In a week, or a year, or a decade, circumstances will be different and that’s the beautiful thing about life. As life changes and evolves, we can seek out the help of the Lord to help us navigate life’s demands.
Article by Kelly Pardue
Kelly Pardue serves as the Primary President in her ward and is a member of the Hurst Stake of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Her favorite thing in the whole world is being a wife, and being mom to six kids is a very close second. She’s always had a testimony of the gospel but her conversion came at warp speed during seminary (an early morning scripture study class.)